I Came for the Coinbelts, I Stayed for the Friends
Belly dance found me by way of a flyer to Zaphara’s class at Phinney Ridge. At the time, I was two years out of high school, had not yet gone to college, and I was floating. I had a job as a church secretary (yes, really!), I was learning to fly airplanes at Boeing Field, and most nights of the week, I was taking kickboxing at a sweaty hole in the wall in White Center, sometimes affectionately (or not-so-affectionately) known as “Rat City.” When a friend brought me a flyer for belly dancing, I decided this was exactly the missing piece I needed to launch a career as an international spy à la Mata Hari.
Looking back, I can’t believe the great fortune I had landing in Zaphara’s class as my first foray in to belly dancing. I remember hearing the music and the tinkling of coinbelts as I ascended the stairs at the Phinney Ridge Community Center for my first class. Inside the expansive room, the beautifully worn hardwood floor was packed edge to edge with women of all shapes, sizes and ages, and the energy was intoxicating. As I joined the women swaying their luscious hips to the intricate, seductive sounds of Middle Eastern music, I knew I had entered a world that I wanted to be part of.
What I never could have guessed at the time was how that first belly dancing class would change my life. I eventually let go of kickboxing for several reasons, one of which was that I soon realized that there was a good chance of getting my face bashed in right before a belly dance performance. Flying airplanes turned out to be far too expensive on a secretary salary.
But belly dancing? I loved every part of it, and still do. I mean, the music, the movement, the connection to Middle Eastern cultures, the glittery costumes, the sequins, the silk, did I mention glittery costumes? But what I love most are the friends.
About the same time that I started Zaphara’s classes, another newbie like me was coming to class with her five-year-old son in tow. I could see that she was an incredibly hardworking single mom who NEEDED belly dancing, so I decided that I could help by making sure her son was also having a good time.
Don’t get me wrong: he was a great kid and definitely wasn’t causing any problems. But, really, what five-year-old wants to hang out in the corner of a classroom for an hour? So, he and I would sneak out now and then and run up and down the halls. I taught him some kickboxing moves. We joked around. And over time, his mom and I became great friends.
As rookies in Zaphara’s troupe, we used to giggle at gigs about farting into our chiffon skirts to make them flutter. Penny and I went to all of the festivals together, and eventually worked together on a nonprofit, Middle East Arts International, which brought in big names like Hossam Ramzy and Yousry Sharif. We have shared a life and friends together, and when I was going through chemo, she was there for me, taking care of my kids and making fancy meals for my family.
Through it all, I learned what an extraordinary person Penny is. A total badass. She put herself through college while working fulltime, raising her son, taking in exchange students, and belly dancing. And besides being smart, fashionable and successful, she’s also kick in the pants hilarious. And generous. And big-hearted. And a damn good friend. Basically, she’s the bomb.
I treasure my friendship with Penny that has now spanned decades, and it all started with belly dance. She was the first close friend that I made in dance, and I have had the great fortune to make many, many more friends through dance since then. It boggles my brain and makes my heart explode with love to think of how many people have touched my life over these past 20+ years. From the countless dancers I have performed and collaborated with, to the instructors who have inspired and supported me, to my students whose impact on my life extends far beyond the classroom: these women (and a few men!) have made my life rich and beautiful beyond my wildest dreams.
There is a good chance that if you are reading this now, you are one of those people. Thank you. Thank you with all of my heart for being YOU, for loving our dance, and for letting me share it with you.
For more gushing about Zaphara, see an entry on my previous blog: Ode to My Greek Mother
Isn’t Penny just lovely? :)
